Not in my backyard?

[Surrealist]

There is a disturbing thread running through a lot of the commentary in this forum, which seems to be vaguely reminiscent of Enoch Powell. Scrape off a bit of the caring facade and there is more than a whiff of conservatism (please note the small "c" - I'm not trying to be that insulting) polluting the air round here.

I've therefore decided, in fine Porty tradition, to start an action group dedicated to forcing people who whine about "their" community being swamped by "junkies", "wasters", "youths", "unemployed" (or whoever the hate group this week is) to leave Portobello themselves.

I also have the perfect location for them to go to. It's a novel concept in urban engineering built by Disney - a veritable utopia for the middle classes - a completely purpose-built town in Florida called "Celebration".



You've probably already heard about it - failing that you've seen its prototype in "The Truman Show". Houses are a mere $220,000 a pop and as long as you trim your lawn regularly and make sure your curtains are the regulation colour, you'll be laughing - there's not a homeless in sight, and if there were, they would probably clamp them or something.

I'll have to do fundraising as shipping the entire John Street Action Group will be costly, but at least it will free up some badly needed housing for some more needy, and hopefully less snooty, residents of our - and here's a dirty word - COMMUNITY.